out of the woods

“Mom and I are going to ‘Howl at the Moon’ tonight, a dueling-piano bar. Mom’s friend Sarah’s parents won a party there, so we are invited. I’ll have to ‘go slow’ so I can make sure Mom doesn’t forget who she is and do something wild and crazy. You know your mom and dueling-pianos.”

fact: my father is a perfect person

did i tell the internet about the time a few weeks ago when he went to look at a property in Nowhere Nebraska and was so taken in by their quaint rurality that as soon as he was done he went to the country store and bought Wrangler jeans without trying them on

and then they didn’t fit and he was sad he couldn’t be a cowboy